Why did the chicken cross the road?

...

Karl Marx
It was a historical inevitability.

Thomas de Torquemada
Give me ten minutes with the chicken and I'll find out.

Timothy Leary
Because that's the only kind of trip the Establishment would let it take.

Nietzsche
Because if you gaze too long across the Road, the Road gazes also across you.

Carl Jung
The confluence of events in the cultural gestalt necessitated that individual chickens cross roads at this historical juncture, and therefore synchronicitously brought such occurrences into being.

Jean-Paul Sartre
In order to act in good faith and be true to itself, the chicken found it necessary to cross the road.

Ludwig Wittgenstein
The possibility of "crossing" was encoded into the objects "chicken" and "road," and circumstances came into being which caused the actualisation of this potential occurrence.

Albert Einstein
Whether the chicken crossed the road or the road crossed the chicken depends upon your frame of reference.

Aristotle
To actualise its potential.

Buddha
If you ask this question, you deny your own chicken-nature.

Salvador Dali
The Fish.

Darwin
It was the logical next step after coming down from the trees.

Ralph Waldo Emerson
It didn't cross the road it transcended it.

Johann Friedrich von Goethe
The eternal hen-principle made it do it.

Ernest Hemingway
To die. In the rain.

Machiavelli
So that its subjects will view it with admiration, as a chicken which has the daring and courage to boldly cross the road, but also with fear, for whom among them has the strength to contend with such a paragon of avian virtue? In such a manner is the princely chicken's dominion maintained.

IT Consultant
Deregulation of the chicken's side of the road was threatening its dominant market position. The chicken was faced with significant challenges to create and develop the competencies required for the newly competitive market. We, in a partnering relationship with the client, helped the chicken by rethinking its physical distribution strategy and implementation processes. Using our Poultry Integration Model (PIM) we helped the chicken use its skills, methodologies, knowledge capital and experiences to align the chicken's people, processes and technology in support of its overall strategy within a Program Management framework. We convened a diverse cross-spectrum of road analysts and best chickens along with our consultants with deep skills in the transportation industry to engage in a two-day itinerary of meetings in order to leverage their personal knowledge capital, both tacit and explicit, and to enable them to synergies with each other in order to achieve the implicit goals of delivering and successfully architecting and implementing an enterprise-wide value framework across the continuum of poultry cross-median processes. The meeting was held in a park like setting enabling and creating an impactful environment which was strategically based, industry-focused, and built upon a consistent, clear, and unified market message and aligned with the chicken's mission, vision, and core values. This was conducive towards the creation of a total business integration solution. We helped the chicken change to become more successful.